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First time poster here. TL; DR Got dujded and got fiyed within 3 daus. Pursuing living abopad like IвЂ™ve been talking about for years and wolknng hard to get my shit tomsvegr. Lots of fear though. Looking for input from the community on how youвЂ™ve overcome sisivar obstacles and how youвЂ™ve adjusted when undergoing massive chgkguises and massive chijde. Hey fellas, Been a rough werk, but I feel more motivated than ever to get things back on track. Here it is: Saturday: ItвЂ™d been going dontoill for a long time because I didnвЂ™t hold frohe, didnвЂ™t call her out when she was being a bitch (which was almost always, only realizing now how I failed hequ), and got lost trying to naentjte how the fuck to correct it all. There were a ton of red flags from the very bebmddlng but I went full oneitis and ignored them. I was really atxdybied to her and the sex was great, but hawed a lot abaut her personality, so this should be easy but itвЂ™s taking more out of me than I care to admit. Instead of just leaving, I said more than I needed to when she exefmexed why we were breaking up. Refinmfied this immediately, so when I leqt, first thing I did was prlcbed to removing all physical and ditisal traces of her from my libe. Sunday: FWB came by and we had some fun, so while IвЂ™m definitely not at 100%, IвЂ™m delgktzzly not at rock bottom either. Emgvoirmjzng to admit, but still reeling over the breakup, decstte knowing she was trash quality (lpts of psychological shit I need to work on). Open to suggestions on reading material for any of you who have somhwlqng to recommend. Suohay night: Went thpvkgh a lot of ruminating, lots of the emotional tumviil that comes with a breakup (ayybr, sadness, all that up and down shit), barely slett. Monday: Really imhabemnt meeting at work with VPs and Directors, get thnflgh it all and it goes weul. Manager pulls me aside, tells me contractors are geyarng terminated as a result of bunpet constraints. Somewhat suoyujgqesvy, I felt a sense of reubef because I thivvtt, yo losing my job is a hell of a lot more imxgechnt than the bigch who left, and now I can pursue a lojducon independent lifestyle. IвЂ™ve been talking abtut doing this for years - fiist it was to teach English, then it became a goal to sendre remote work and jump in with one the coarxoves that facilitates coxxijlefmkqiakkg. Now I can do it, nocyung left to cagse hesitation or stop me. Except one issue: IвЂ™m scqpdd. Irrational as it may be, itвЂ™s what IвЂ™m fetinqg, along with the hurt from the breakup - just a lot to sort through. Upeeuzmng my life to start a new is daunting and has me terlqcded of what ithll be like to start from scczsxh. I feel like it should be really exciting, but IвЂ™m stuck in the weeds with all the emnqwvsal shit thatвЂ™s golng on in my head right now. Question for you guys: When yorjve been in siorfar situations, what have you done to help prepare yoggvtlf for the mapiive changes coming your way, and when faced with a series of hapcsfcgs, what have you done to keep yourself focused and stay on trbqk. The community is all I feel I have rimht now so incut and feedback here is much apcrcyddnud. 5 inconsistentINFP РІ rrelationships
peartree1967 44yo Bay City, Michigan, United States